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African American Horror Story

by Effswell

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Spooky Season is Effswell's time of year to Purge some old ideologies from the world. Its a smashed pumpkin-spiced party and you're invited! Will you survive?

From the first hit of producer Shepard's eerie piano, this song instantly takes off in storytelling form and ends in a place no one would have expected. Join Effswell in a titilating tale that all started on a creepy autumn night!


[Spoken: Innocent]
Hey, I, uh…
Wonder what THIS button does…

[Spoken: Authority]

[Verse 1: Effswell]
(Can’t Stop Dancin’!)
Dancin’ & Dancin’ & Dancin’, I’m frantic
I stay in some antics, and
Some would say I’ve got a way with semantics
Robbed The Louvre and got away with the canvas
Now Mona only smiles for me and Chris Hansen
“Have a seat over there”, Mon Frere
Half of the things I say on top of beats? Unfair
One thing that I wanna make of the streets: Aware
Awake, alert; OF COURSE I care
I curse, I swear; I swear ‘fore God
Got the very same instructions as my dick: Go hard!
Spit life when I’m young, go limp when I’m done
And keep it raw as possible when the lovin’ time comes
Awwwwwwwww, Armorall ya’ll
Knowledge so polished gold watches see me shining so onyx
That they just stop ticking and tockin’
‘Cause I spit that shit that’s off the leash
Like baggies of doggie droppings
Droppin’…. When’s your mixtape droppin’?
And how long will it take for your sound to start poppin’, huh?
When will the ladies treat you good with the Pooh?
Give them Hundred Acres of Wood, no Christopher Robin
Holy Canoli, Bat-dude!
They had no clue Effswell was THAT rude
Lady Friend comparable to a vacuum
With a Bachelor of Arts from the Throwin’ it Back School
Shorty asked me (HUH?) what my favorite dinosaur is
Either Get-a-Lottapuss or a Leaver-With-a-Soreass (ROAR!)
She called me crass, so I laughed at her ass
And I helped her find her coat then showed her where the door is (“Right this way”)
Uptight? That’s quite unnerving 
Started by pulling her leg & now I’m jerking
Guess I was being a jerk, a jive turkey
All in the name of perving

[Spoken: Effswell]
(Oh yeah)
I can’t believe this girl, man!
She better not come back (That’s all I can say)
Asking me for NOTHING! (I don’t got anything to give at this point)
Man, where my grinder at?
Where my trees at?
Wait… what’s that sound?

[Spoken: Narrator]
And at that moment, a tiny voice appeared from the other side of the door.

[Sung: Ghost]
Joseph, please let me in
I thought you were a nice guy, and maybe we could be friends
See, I can tell that you’re outta your mind
‘Cause you locked me out
Didn’t even take note of the fact that you kicked me outta MY house!

[Spoken: Effswell]
Oh, this is your house?
Yo, please don’t call the police — BLACK LIVES MATTER!!
Oh no, no, no seriously… it was an honest mistake
Nah nah nah it’s cool
…Lose my number!


released October 31, 2019
"African American Horror Story"
Written by: J.A. Cross
Produced by: Shepard
Recorded/Mixed by: D1 @ Soul Blue Studios
Mastered by: Storm9000
Artwork by: Effswell


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Effswell Columbus, Ohio

After 7 years of working as the lead vocalist of a Midwestern cover band, Effswell (born Joseph A. Cross) continues to blaze a trail with many upcoming solo releases.

Effswell’s OutKast-homage project, "KastAways: The Extra-Celestial" landed in August 2016, followed by 2019's "Won Dream Free(dom)style" & “African American Horror Story”. With a new EP now in the works, Effswell plans to FLY!
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